Shrink the poor

Shrink the poor.

The problem in the United States is not how many poor people we have, the problem is there size! Have you ever noticed they are as big as rich people – heck sometimes they are even bigger!
Now consider this – do you ever REALLY notice the ants in your front yard? No, of course not, - because the ant’s are really small. They don’t take up any space and there are millions of them, and you don’t care – because they are so damn small!
So the problem is – the poor are too large.
How to solve this? Well currently we have a debate in Congress, The Republicans say we cannot afford the $33 billion for the unemployed but we CAN afford $1 trillion in tax cuts for the rich.
I say – let’s give the unemployed there money, but they have to agree to undergo a genetic alteration process whereby every generation they are physically reduced in size. The bible says: The poor are always with us. I say ok, but if they are on the public dole can’t we reduce their physical size until we really don’t care? Think about it, one subway car could hold all the poor people in North America. One Family Farm could feed them all. One Cessna could take them on vacation, etc.
So here is my compromise Republicans, you prefer your poor unheard and unseen – so why not take the logical next step and make them disappear all together? It’s not like you will miss them, and who knows if you make them small enough they won’t even vote anymore and then you can do away with them altogether like any pest that dares to live to near you. Who could possibly object to that?

Ticketmaster - Live Nation Merger makes me sick!

Completely off topic - (almost)

Ticketmaster/Live Nation Merger? Now? Really? Ok dummies you had 8 years of the Bush administration to pull this BS off and you want to try to do it now? Are you kidding? This thing DEFINES what anti-trust is all about. What kind of knuckleheads work for these two that they wait for a Democratic Congress and a Democratic President to pull this garbage.

I hope the blowback is to BREAKUP TICKETMASTER - Now we're talking!

Teach these knuckle dragging buffoons that stupidity comes with a price.

How about this guys? Lets let a non-profit take over the ticketing business with the profits going to a home for indigent musicians? Sure beats the status quo.

Yours, HB

Introduction to a HealthyBastard

So - Hello to all! First things, first a few quick Caveats - No I am not an actual Bastard, Secondly not that there is really anything wrong with that as Bastard has lost virtually all its original meaning and now implies to most simply someone who is cantankerous etc.

Next - I'm also not particularly healthy - not unhealthy per-say but certainly have room for great improvement - so to me HealthyBastard is both my current status and my future goal.

So why this blog?

I want to use this blog to both get a few things off my, chest - set some humble goals and track them, and finally amuse my friends and family. So with that said here we go!

Valentines Day is coming!

So here it is a few weeks after Christmas and the retail industry is hitting you up for your cash again - Candy, Flowers, Greeting Card, Chochka's and expensive dinner/evening out! And you sir - what exactly will you get in exchange for this payoff? Well what is it you want? To be left alone? Forgetaboutit. More sexual intimacy? Highly doubtful, birthrates in September come in third - and only because its 9 months from a winter month. So lets test this girl, this love of your life and do something this year over the top romantic and it will not cost you a dime!

Try this, go to Google Books check out Yeats "Ode to a Nightingale" Write it down longhand and then put it in an envelope with a single heart on the seal. Or you might read it to her! either way you now stand a serious chance of finding out what she thinks Valentines Day is about.
If she flunks this test - congratulations you just saved yourself some $$$ and can spend it on internet love... If she passes this test - I think you may be getting luckeeee!

One more thing as the HealthyBastard - Stay away from all that crappy candy!

HB